By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
