well I can't set my house on fire every night
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize