She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
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