I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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