Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
