I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
