For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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