community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
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