therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize