Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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