dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
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