Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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