i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize