so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
