my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
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