You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
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