you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
