Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Randomize
