he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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