He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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