That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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