the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
