i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
