in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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