And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
