come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Randomize
