Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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