I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
