Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
