oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Randomize
