You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
