the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize