You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Randomize
