I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Randomize