The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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