when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
