garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
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