Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
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