After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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