Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
