I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
