sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
