you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Nicole vs. Life
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
