Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
