Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize