After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize