I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
foreskin is a definite game changer
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
