this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
he shaved USA in his pubs
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
