8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
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