Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
