But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Randomize
